Counting pepperoni

“This is going to be nice having help finding these places tonight,” he says.

He opens his door and reaches back to grab the forest green pizza bag. He goes around the back of the car slowly to avoid slipping on the icy driveway, climbs the stairs to the porch and knocks on the door. After handing off the pizza to a man, Jamie gets back to the car and tosses the bag into the backseat beside me.

The toppings in the buffet await deployment. {larger}

Back at Guys, there aren’t any open parking spots—we take the handicapped place again.

When we walk into the store, Dan’s on the phone taking an order—two Guyzones, similar to calzones. He gets off the phone and takes some dough to the toppings buffet. As Jamie reads him the receipt, Dan takes the circular lump and spreads it out, forming it into a black deep dish pan.

“We have a dough fairy that brings the dough,” he says.

Actually Guys Pizza has two stores, and the dough is made at the store in Euclid.

Dan cuts the extra that has crept up the pan’s edges, and (with a spiked roller) he puts air holes in the dough. He ladles and spreads marinara sauce over the dough and sprinkles on mozzarella cheese. From metal tubs, he spreads spinach, olives and banana peppers on the dough. The 12-foot long toppings buffet has tubs of sauce, mozzarella cheese, pepperoni, sausage, mushrooms, onions, green and banana peppers, bacon, pineapples, ham, broccoli, spinach and gyro meat.

“We have a dough fairy that brings the dough.”

“We’re usually faster than this,” Dan says, “but you’re putting pressure on us.”

The phone rings and Dan answers, “Guys Pizza? OK. What’s your phone number?”

While searching the computer’s database of names and addresses, he asks the customer if he’s ordered before. He hasn’t, and Dan types in the name and address. He listens to the order and says it’ll be 15 minutes.

Jamie has finished the Guyzones and places them in the oven as Dan puts down the phone and starts making a large pepperoni pizza. When pepperoni-ing, he says he tries to cover the pizza.

“No way I count them,” Dan says. “That’d take way too long.”

When pepperoni-ing the pizza, Dan says it is impossible to count the pepperonis because it would take too long. {larger}

Jamie is slicing a cooked pizza and calls over, “How many slices does a medium have?”

Eight.

“If you stay until 2 (a.m.), you’ll know as much as we do,” Jamie says.

He grabs some change from the cash register and heads out the door with two Guyros and two medium pizzas.

We get to Crain Avenue, but reading the address numbers is difficult.

“It gets hard,” Jamie says. “That’s why I have that Maglite back there. I just hang out the window and shine it on houses.”

next page ›› 1...3